Sunday, November 6, 2011

Changing outcomes in communication

NLP is an extensive variety  of skills that can be applied to any genre that you can think of to improve it and communication is a huge part of this.

Internal representation
If you would like to improve anything outside of yourself you must first improve the ways that you represent information inside of yourself.

Feel great for no reason at all ... It feels Great
The way you feel is a great indicator as to how and if you are staying on course with your own self management.

Consider the impact of your non verbal communication first
The way you feel is communicated to others through the way that you communicate first Non verbally and then Verbally.

Calibrating Rapport, pacing and leading are all parts of excellent communication, we should understand that communication is much like dancing, and their are people who can dance, people who can dance well and Dancers.


Any easy way to gauge how you are communicating is to ask yourself, how do I feel in this moment.
If the answer is great then this is a solid foundation for communicating well.

Communication is much like a Dance 
After all even if a Dancer was excellent if they performed while in a really bad mood and were not able to maintain sync with their partner they would have a bad performance.

Often times sensory awareness begins before even non verbal communication, people can get a sense of how you are communicating with yourself, the world and or them at an instinctual level.

Set the Emotional Tone
In fact Dancing is completely non verbal and yet we really enjoy the emotion that is communicated in Dance, and we expect to be impacted by the emotion, don't we.

As you know communicating well has many variables and how you feel is just the foundation. Great and consistent communication is an art that takes time and practice to develop.

If you are running into confrontations often then consider this.

Remember this 
Remember Virginia Satir who point blank tells us "The meaning of your communication is the response you are getting".


Sometimes it is as simple as taking a breath and stop talking to really begin to listen.
It may feel as if you have been listening for hours, but communication will not change until you change how you feel about the communication.

If you get upset then your communication will probably upset others too.

Stop and compose yourself 
Stop and take a breath, as often as you need too.

Sometimes people are not really saying the very thing they mean, calibrate for congruence in peoples communication, so you can help them find the solution they are really looking for.

Consider other peoples Maps
We have spoken many times now about people Maps, Perceptions, Beliefs, Values, Opinions all the things that create a persons way of thinking or processing and understanding the things that  are happening.

So, communication excellence is a long term journey of personal excellence, a great question to ask yourself is what will great communication mean to me.

Good Communication equals Success 
Tony Robbins says Successful people are also great communicators.
What can you do right now to change how you are communicating ?




 

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Nadia.