Monday, November 12, 2012

How to turn a Mistake into a learning experience with NLP | NLP is Fun

Making a mistake is part of being human, And sometimes we may make the same mistake over and over again. The worst part is sometimes we get so frustrated about our behavior that we tend to beat ourselves up about it on the inside.

Which isn't really very kind and has the opposite effect of being productive. sometimes it will even deter us from even trying new things because we keep making the same mistake over and over again. and then playing it in our mind movie over and over again.

Don't get stuck in a rut focusing on the wrong thing, for example focusing on failure is not helping anything. It continues to disconnect us from the process of changing.

Blaming other people for our own feelings as well as worrying about what other people think about our mistakes is a massive drain of energy and can really pull you out of focus with your original intention.

Make sure you are OK and learn how to be kind to yourself. When we hold higher significance to how bad the problem is we can remain stuck and lose focus of the solution.

Self acceptance and Self love are such important parts of moving on. Quite often once we adopt an attitude of "I accept that I have done this and I don't want to do this anymore" we are forming a new relationship to the problem and have already began the process of moving away from the behavior.
There is a lesson in all of our behavior and it is quite possible we haven't learned our lesson yet.

Even if you continue to make the same mistakes it will feel different while doing it, and reduce the intensity of this behavior until it changes completely.

Mistakes really are just positive learning experiences when you think of it. Everything about this next exercise helps you to unconsciously re frame your behavior and intention.

I am certain you will enjoy this, I used it earlier today and worked through a bothersome experienced which now makes perfect sense to me This pattern is very quick to do and very simple.
I recommend you get a pen and a few sheets of paper or your Diary, Today you are going to be your own coach.

Give it a go, towards the end of it, you will begin to understand in a new way of experiencing, this will be different to how you were experiencing before. Now you can do more of this and less of that ..

The Pattern:

# 1 Identify the Compulsive behavior / Habit
a) Specify what it is
b) Look for a Partner
i.e this causes that - Like I only smoke when I drink or I Always spend too much money when I am with Tracy

# 2 Identify the limiting belief you have that supports this pattern
a) Identify the Belief, or beliefs (my be multiple supporting this behavior)
b) Find out if you are focused on the Habit instead of content (which holds the info in this case) sometimes missing the forest for trees.
c) Find out if a higher Value / Belief / Need override this pattern

#3 Have you ever experienced anything similar
a) make a list of other places this pattern shows up in your life - you may be surprised to notice it as a constant theme in a certain area.
This will also match the supporting limiting beliefs in #2

#4 Compare it to a worst case scenario
a) What could be the absolute pits compared to what you are doing now, how much worse could it be.
b) Find some gratitude in that experience

#5 What are the positive By products of this experience
a) step back and gain a big picture of any positive benefits from this experience
b) Go deeper and look for more gratitude

#6  Understand the Positive Intentions in this Experience Fully
a) Understand exactly what these positive learning's are
b) Is there a way to understand other peoples intentions in this experience positively now
c) List what other peoples positive intentions were in your new understanding

#7 Find some positive meaning to the whole thing
a) Positive meaning #1
b) Has your experience changed on a certain level
c) How has your life improved because of meaning #1, 2, 3 or however many positive meanings you found
d) Are you finding your mind has changed in another level too
e) Can this discoveries show up in other areas of your life to change those positively too

#8 Time to Re - Edit using your brand new positive insights
a) Run through the mistake using your new positive editing tools
b) Notice how you feel now

#9 Future Pace and Edit as necessary
Do you know thoughts are a little bit like pebbles in that we have so many of them some bigger and some smaller,who can keep count. 
Would you say most of your thoughts are helping you or hindering you ?

Remember when people stop making pain a priority, your mind wanders toward pleasure at every opportunity.

Since you enjoyed this NLP Blog please share it with somebody else who can benefit too. NLP is Fun has a great archive of useful information you can find tons of Brain food here, if you want to change your mind and your life. 

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